Run the Gamut (117)

To run the gamut- To experience, display or perform the range of things.

I am experiencing joy, calm and a sense of completion at the end of the week after grading and maintaining my classes. I am exhausted and frustrated after another week of the same thing.

I am a teacher 7 days a week. I know we say we are going to not do teacher stuff, on the weekends but, with late work and progress reports coming out Monday- there is a continual influx of parent emails, students submissions and updating the grade book.

I am a mother 7 days a week to a house full of children. One ten years old, bored and an endless bundle of conversation and need. I am trying to maintain a semblance of normalcy as he is cooped up in the house. A walk. Board games and the like.

I am receiving kind emails from parents who see I am doing my best- keeping in contact, messaging students- keeping them on track the best I can. But, then also some emails with rude and finger pointing. It's amazing the gamut of responses.

One parent thanks me every week for inspiring her child in this time of uncertainty. Another parent sent a hateful- how dare you expect me to get my student to do his work. You should print it out and bring it to my house- that way he wont get distracted by his computer. Yes, she typed this. Then, continued to explain I wasn't doing enough.

It stung. Believe me. This is also a student who in the brick and mortar setting never did his work or participated in class. But at least then, I could look him in the eye and use mindfulness strategies to engage him. But, with distance learning- we lose that connection. Zoom or not. That connection is gone.

Today has been one of coming to terms with the fact that I can't be there for every student- exactly how they need me to be. I have 180 students, and I am doing my best to keep everyone engaged and interactive. BUT, ultimately it is up to them.

I am a parent of two school aged children and trust me- they are working on their assignments but they miss some. I get emails too. But, I simple say thank you for all you are doing and I will make sure he gets it turned in. Parents think because we are teachers we are home with nothing to do.

For the first time, many are seeing the strength, determination and complete involvement a teacher has to give to help students learn. Yes, they are basically teaching themselves right now. We can give them lessons but without our daily guidance, our presence, eye contact and face to face interaction- unfortunately this has become a personal journey for them and for us.