A Call for Perfection #52

There has always been a call for perfection: the perfect body, the perfect social persona, the perfect score. Win, win, win. Only smile and say positive things. Never complain. Always look at the bright side of life. Toxic positivity they call it. I think no one is happy all the time. Walking around on rose petals and singing songs of joy and optimism.

Life is messy. It is both beautiful and ugly. It is full of people who inspire us, lead us to great heights. It is marked by people who tear us down and break us. We have days of contentment. Others of depression and anxiety. Yet, we were raised to always put a smile on our face and stay positive. There has always been a call for perfection.

We all understand that the social feeds of people's lives full of gorgeous food and clothes and destinations- people frolicking on the beach 24/7 are facades. We know this yet, we seek it. We so want people to like us. We want others to follow us. We want people to envy us. But perfection is messy, like life, it is full of failures and mistakes. So why do we cling so much to the need to be perfect? To be seen as perfect? When we know in our hearts it doesn't exist.

Mental health has started to become a buzzword. Recent events have plunged many into the realms of  stress laden days and insomnia filled nights. But, many still cling to the surface film of "that is them, not me." Accepting that we struggle is the first step. That asking for help is human and necessary is step two. The umbrella under which all of these steps preside- real life. Real life is hard. Getting up for work is a struggle for many- having a job even more so.

I try to stay positive. But, I am not always so. My motto- negativity is a warm blanket, just as much as positivity. We yearn for connectedness and sometimes the negativity train arrives first at the station. We grab hold of what we need, to feel a part of something. But negativity has a cost- it is more expensive in the long run. For when we throw stones at someone else- we forget others are throwing some at us too. We have to clean up the mess of publicized negativity.  

Everyone is judged. Everyone has a persona they are trying to maintain. Negativity attracts more negativity.

Anxiety and depression are a part of life. 

Everyone goes through them. 

Everyone struggles with them. 

Some bounce back quicker than others. But everyone has felt them. Yet, they seem like flaws. So, we try to hide them. But, when we face them- as mole hills and not mountains- we can combat them with a shovel rather than a Earth mover or plow. We need to accept that perfection doesn't exist. Every situation has its rough edges. Everyone needs a little adjustment, pivot, and shuffle now and then.

I say there needs to be call for honesty. 

For conversation. 

For acceptance and warmth. 

If we can talk about our struggles, someone will hear. Someone who needs to hear they are not alone- will hear. I know I write about it- others podcast, write and blog about it too. There is a camaraderie of those of us who struggle. We need to keep sharing. We need to keep honest. We need to share our stories. 

For the opposite of perfection is not failure or a flawed existence- it is growth, movement, innovation and creativity. It is the opposite of finality- because we know the road is still unfolding. That my friends is hope.